You may be in a sales cult if...
- You are "sharing" an opportunity to your friend, not selling him something
- Your doing your friend a favor by "sharing" this great opportunity
- You are intentionally keeping something hidden (but not outright mysteries)
- You only have 1 friend at a time (for the opportunity pitches)
- You consider any adult not asleep as potential "friend" to share opportunity with
- You only talk in elevator speeches (entire pitch is within 60 seconds)
- You handle rejection by being magnanimous: remember me, it's okay you're not ready
Wait, there's more!
You May be In a Sales Cult if Your Meeting Looked Like this:
8:30 AM Group breakfast, chit chat
9:30 AM Upbeat music to start the meeting, get your blood flowing!
10:00 AM Host starts meeting, talks about rules (no bathroom or other breaks?!) then individuals get on stage to introduce oneself
11:00 AM Boss gets on stage and talk about company plan, attitudes, platitudes... how it'll be the greatest in a couple years, and we all will make tons of money!
12:00 PM "I will succeed" skit, the "leader" goes on stage, being pulled from both sides, 4 positive, 4 negative. Positive side saying "you will succeed", negative side saying "you will fail", they had a bit of tug of war, then the leader will "break free" from the negative side and the positive side whisked him away and the negative side moonwalked back off the stage. (Details may vary, but you get the idea)
1:00 PM 1 hour lunch break, not enough
2:00 PM Small group cheering the new members "Welcome! Welcome!" Much like frat house welcoming new pledges.
3:00 PM Small group mutual rating system, with comments from the leader, like "you need a haircut", "wear a suit", etc.
5:00 PM Senior reps leading talks about how to invite different types of "friends", how to shut on your inner warning voice (poisonous!), then mutual practice and feedback
8:00 PM Half hour dinner with really cheap crap food
8:30 PM Group skit... Two groups... Those inside yelling "I will succeed!" and those outside yelling "No you won't! You're a loser!" This is couched as "roleplaying", "reflecting reality", "mental toughening", etc. Swap roles and try again.
10:00 PM Senior leaders get on stage and share stories about how tough his/her life was, how the company changes his/her life, blah blah blah. Tears are not uncommon.
11:00 PM Group activity, heavy dance music... YMCA, Macarena, Conga line, etc.
Midnight Retire to 24-hour restaurant nearby (probably McD) to small groups where you discuss "what did you learn".
What this is is cult brainwashing.
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